Showing posts with label Tim Tebow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tim Tebow. Show all posts

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Preseason Podcast for the College Football Guys!

Finally!


The college football season is finally upon us! Join the College Football Guys as they discuss who will be playing in the BCS National Championship Game, Heisman trophy winners, and sleeper teams. Also will Florida finish the season number one? Are Lou Holtz and Beno Cook crazy for picking ND to go undefeated?

Also a preview of Bama/Va Tech, Georgia/Okie State, Oregon/Boise State, Miami/Florida State, and BYU/Oklahoma. Included is a little friendly wager between LSU boy Ethan and Washington kid Cas for this weekend's LSU/U Dub game.

Plus "What Would Tim Tebow Do if he were here right now?"





Packed episode and worth every minute!

Click here. Press play and ENJOY!



Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Colt McCoy - Texas Ranger


Since we have learned that Tim Tebow wears Colt McCoy Pajamas to bed, it does indeed appear that the torch of "awesomeness" has been passed. Here are some facts we found out about Colt McCoy and we don't believe any of these are Chuck Norris rip offs. If you think of any we might have missed, please let us know.

Tim Tebow wears Colt McCoy Crocs.

Colt McCoy sure the hell doesn't wear jorts.

When Colt McCoy was born the Hatfield's surrendered.

Everything is bigger in Colt McCoy!

Colt McCoy dug the Red River with his bare hands to keep the riffraff out of the "Republic."

If Colt McCoy had been in San Antonio in 1836 there would be no Alamo.

Colt McCoy has not only solved every puzzle on the caps of Lone Star beer, but he has also created the last 114 riddles.

Chuck Norris and Mr. T’s fists collided once in the mid 80's, resulting in the birth of Colt McCoy.

From here on out the month of October will known in the Gregorian calendar as Coltober. The Eras shall be named the same, BC (Before Colt) and AD (Anno Domini - The year of our Colt), however they will now be adjusted to reflect the year of Colt's birth. Today's date: Coltober 29, 22 AD.

On the second weekend of Coltober, from here on out, the Oklahoma Sooners will walk from Norman, Oklahoma to Hobbs, New Mexico, the birthplace of our Colt, and then sprint to Dallas for the Red River Shootout. Any Sooner starter who cannot cover the distance in the same time it takes Colt himself to cover it (one hour, 12 minutes, 12 seconds) will be benched.

The draft from Colt's passing arm has been the cause of two of every three trailer destroying tornadoes that have torn through Norman. With his other arm he writes novels and signs treaties.

Colt McCoy put the Bock in Shiner.

Texas Toast was Colt McCoy’s creation.

Colt McCoy convinced the Aggies that the thumbs up sign means Gig em'.

It was Colt McCoy's decision to declare Tim Tebow "the Chosen One."

"Don't Mess with Texas!" were Colt's first words.

Colt McCoy's sweat cures gout, crohn's disease, avian flu, and the children of Indonesia, saving Tim Tebow's Cancun spring break plans.

At Whataburger the sandwiches are now referred to as the Coltburger and the Bradfordchicken.

Colt McCoy wasn't named after the gun, the Colt .45 was modeled after his arm.

In order to make things fair and exhibit good sportsmanship, Colt McCoy gives the Texas playbook to Texas A&M every year before the game between the two schools. He also teaches a free reading class to the A&M coaches so that they understand it. Unfortunately for A&M, this olive branch of humanitarianism doesn't always work.

Colt McCoy created Lubbock to place the prisoners of the "Republic of Texas." He left one pirate crazed coach and another who loves chair throwing to run the asylum.

Fiesta Bowl is Spanish for Colt McCoy which is why the Oklahoma Sooners are destined to lose every time they play in University of Phoenix Stadium.

Colt McCoy knows how to find and capture Osama Bin Laden.

Colt McCoy is the reason a bridge in Alaska goes to nowhere.

Colt tried out for the Olympic track & field team, but was disqualified because he threw the shot-put ball out of the stadium. Not having a tape measure long enough to measure his throw he could not qualify. Upset, he then took a second shot-put ball and through an out route to himself spiking the ball on the judge's foot. He then crumbled pieces of the earth in his hands and made his own gold medal that read "There Can Only Be One."

Indeed there can be only one Colt McCoy.

Know any other interesting facts about Colt McCoy? Comment below, or email us at email@thecollegefootballguys.com and we will post them later this week!

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Is the AntiChrist Lurking?

It has been played to the hilt the past 48 hours. Tim Tebow will NOT accept a nomination, or a spot on the Playboy All-American Team claiming he cannot endorse a magazine that has naked women in it. This is the latest off season news story portraying the life of a perfect human being. Causing more and more people to really question "Is Tim Tebow indeed the Second Coming of Christ?"

We here at The College Football Guys have asked that very same question on a variety of different occasions and are ready to break it down for you. Lets find out once and for all how "The Chosen One" stacks up to the Almighty One.

Wears sandals - Check. "The Favored One's" ugly orange and blue Crocs would constitute as today's sandals. Honestly it is too bad he can't get paid to promote the struggling company. He is single handily making them solvent.

Heals the sink and the poor - Check. Tebow has been on 3 mission trips this summer and everyone knows by now that he performed circumcisions in the Philippines over spring break.

Gave "The Heisman" stiff arm to Satan three times in the desert - Check. While Tim didn't exactly spend time in the desert, he did defy Satan by choosing a missionary trip over scantly clad and loose college women on Spring Break. He told Hef he wasn't interested in his "evil" mag.

Little known fact - he resists the temptation of Wal-Mart's low prices, choosing not to support the "evil empire." He also hates Darth Vader and encourages children to use "the force" that only the Almighty can give.

Reaches out to societies worst - Check. Tebow spoke to two Florida prisons this off season and has been asked to speak to prisons in 5 other states!

Christ had 12 disciples - Check. This one is EASY! TT has more than 12 internet fan clubs! Each with their own "official president" and droves of devote followers. Included in the hysteria is a site he might want to talk to the owner about http://www.tebowner.com/. If Hef ain't good enough, I doubt that pun is.

Gave the Sermon on the Mount to thousands - Check. Tebow plays every Saturday in front of crowds that Christ himself would be jealous of.

Turned water into wine - Check. Everyone knows the power of #15's legs when a play breaks down.

Celibate - Jury's Out. While there are SEVERAL pictures on the web of "The Chosen One," with many beautiful women, according to this article he currently has no time for a girlfriend.

From the evidence above it appears that indeed the Second Coming of Christ walks and talks amongst us. This leaves us with one question, "Who is the AntiChrist Tim Tebow has come to save us from?" The one professed to bring the world into total darkness?

Maybe you can help us find him, before it is too late! Need help spotting he/she/it, here are the characteristics it is professed to possess. We are relying on you to put together your own creative juices and let us know who you think the "AntiChrist" is.

Contribute below or email us at email@thecollegefootballguys.com.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Christ in Cleats Forgotten


The second coming of the messiah has arrived on earth. This is proof that Tim Tebow really is the Christ Child and living and dwelling amongst his people with his healing touch.

As the article states, during Tim Tebow's spring break he visited the Philippines to help his dad and other doctors give health care to those in need. He even preformed a couple of circumcisions...

It is amazing what one man will do in a bid to become a back-to-back Heisman trophy winner. I believe that after this year they are renaming the award in his honor. Note to McFadden, instead of makin' babies the last two years, maybe you should have been circumcising them.

Joe Montana may have been "Christ in Cleats" but that was merely a metaphor. Tebow is truly the Son of God. The only question I have is how does one put on a helmet over a halo so large?

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Ode to Gatorville...


Watching College Gameday and the University of Florida spring game today, on ESPN, made me realize how short changed I was with my college experience. The gang at the Worldwide Leader have made me fall in love with those so "lovable" Gators. Tonight I will dream about what it would have been like to be a Florida Gator. Here are the things I now realize I missed out on.

The opportunity to cast my eyes on the mystic swamp where it is rumored that Tim Tebow walked on water.

The chance to throw a visor in the very stadium as the once great "ol' ball coach."

The ability to call opponents 'bait.

The genius of Urban Meyer, the third coming of Christ! (Spurrier was first, Tebow second)

Learning to clap my hands together in unison to a steady beat.

Seeing how long it takes to be brain washed to believe that the colors blue and orange look good together.

Smelling the flagellant of Tim Tebow to find out once and for all that his shit truly doesn't stink.

The opportunity to be raised by the Tebows and spend my nights memorizing the Holy Book.

The chance to breath the same rare air as some of the greatest QB's of all time, Danny Wuerffel and Rex Grossman.

Watching the great Erin Andrews dance with the Dazzlers.

The next time a tenured literature professor, or a physics researcher complains about how much emphasis is placed on college football and how their coaches are over payed, remember this day. The University of Florida was showcased today in a sappy display the University's marketing department couldn't dream to execute better. All of this in front of a national audience, for 4 hours, in the spring. The same spring most students are making their decisions on where they want to go to school. If the guys at ESPN have convinced this college football guy that Florida is the best school in all the land, just think of the impression they have made on the nation's delicate high school seniors. The pay Urban Meyer and his assistants receive is worth every penny.

Go Gators!

A life long bond!

UF - "The Foundation of Gator Nation!"

Friday, April 11, 2008

Big and Rich are Back!

The lyrical talents of Big and Rich are back this weekend as College Gameday (built by the Home Depot, of course) rolls into Gainesville, FL and into our television sets! This Saturday morning at 11am EST, 10 CST, 9 MST, 8 PST, Fowler, Kirk, and Lee will be back to give us a much needed booster shot of college football! Don't forget to check it out! The Masters can wait. An hour of programing on how great Tim Tebow is can't!



I suppose this suit is OK. It is after Easter. Right Ethan...?

Miss that reference? Check out the March Madness Edition of The College Football Guys.

Speaking of Tim Tebow, maybe this should be the new song for College Gameday...(Parental Discretion Required!)