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Just in time for Sunday's start of the Discovery Channel's Shark Week, The College Football Guys bring you the Top Sharks of College Football.
Sharks are slick, spineless, sneaky and cunning. They have little regard for manners and often leave behind a mess for a family or "school" to clean up. Misunderstood by most, they are crucial to maintaining the balance of the ocean's fragile ecosystem by weeding out weaker or injured creatures.
Like the mysterious creatures of the seas these college football coaches contain many of the same attributes. You might enjoy their success in the short term, as they chow down on weaker opponents. However, what makes you think they won't latch on to the next piece of meat that falls into the ocean leaving you, the program, school and fan, to clean up the mess? Caveat Emptor, let the buyer be aware of the following play callers.
Dennis Erickson - Denny has a history of making promises he can't keep. In just his second NCAA head coaching job at Wyoming he promised a long tenure, yet left after one season to coach Washington State. He spent a mere two seasons at WAZZU before bolting to "The U." After six seasons there he left the program with two national titles and facing 3 years probation. Erickson jumped ship again in 2006, after telling Vandal fans he was going to be around for the long term, he left again, after just one year.
Rich Rodriguez - Initially appeared to be the good guy when he told Alabama no and said he would stay and coach his alma mater for years to come. This might have been true if Michigan had figured out a way to beat a I-AA team from Boone, NC. Rich Rod left for Michigan in the middle of bowl preparations and refused to pay agreed upon buyout.
Evidently collecting keys is not part of a WVU's exit interview, so he snuck back into the office and started shredding notes on players. The balls on Rodriguez and the blades on that shredder where bigger and sharper than any shark we have ever seen.
Rick Neuheisel - With a law degree from UCLA and a member of the Arizona State and DC Bar Associations, Rick already has the necessary qualifications of a shark. "Slick Rick" slipped out of Colorado to become one of the top five paid coaches in the country at Washington leaving CU with 51 NCAA rules violations. After four years at U-DUB Neuheisel lied to the administration about interviews for the 49er's position and then had that "little" incident involving an NCAA "pool." The program STILL hasn't recovered. Maybe time away and coaching for alma mater will change his ways.
Does an alcoholic ever lose his addition? Don't think so...
Nick Saban - This shark will sneak right up on you and attack when you least expect. The "Savior" of Michigan State football, Saban used the program as a nice stepping stone to go coach an LSU team that needed some saving itself. If the story stopped here we might consider him an older, more popular Urban Meyer. However his thirst for blood and money left him with no choice but to seek out the challenge of a bigger "fish." After two years he showed his teeth again and followed the Crimson blood leaving a destroyed Dolphin's team in the wake. 'Bama fans could only say, "We done caught ourselves a big'en!"
Bobby Petrino - Where to begin? Bobby pulled the biggest sneak attack of them all! How do you leave a team in the middle of the season, with a Dear John letter? "Dear Team, I have been doing some thinking and this just isn't working out. I really think we should see other people." It's like breaking up with your girlfriend with a text message on Christmas Day! Only a great shark pulls a stunt like that.
Coaches that might be confussed as sharks:
Houston Nutt - While Arkansas fans are just plain nuts, there is usually a truth somewhere in the middle of two completely different stories. Houston, just tell us, "Did you have relations with Ms. Bragg?"
Mike Price - Vilified in the "southland" for enjoying strippers. The state that brings the world Wesley's Booby Trap was offended by Price's actions. Who is really the hypocrite here?
Mike Gundy - Much like a whale shark, his actions and words are worse than his bite. Enjoys plankton and reporters.
Steve Spurrier - Proves every year at South Carolina he is no longer harmful. He would rather be playing golf with another "Shark."
Enjoy Shark Week everyone! Soon there will be something better to watch on Saturdays!
Since the Hurricanes, Hokies, and Eagles left the Big East for the "greener pastures" of the ACC the Big East has been fighting for respect and recognition. The College Football Guys are here to help. We have made it easy for you to get to know the Big East by pairing them with famous TV shows that we have all come to enjoy.
WVU - "Survivor." The first relevant show in the Big East. Recent drama and changes in format reek of desperation, which continues to make it fun to watch, but for how much longer? Will Bill Stewart and the program "survive" without Rodriguez? Might be destined for syndication in the near future.
Rutgers - "Biggest Loser." Was once a loser with low self esteem. Now healthy, hip and ready to be a winner the rest of their lives. We will see if they can keep their head "trainer" as ratings suffer without.
UConn - "Big Brother." Has origins in another league (England/Division I-AA). Desire to be an elite program. Voyeur nature makes it a guilty pleasure. Unfortunately the program serves as filler until the real season begins (basketball & fall viewing).
USF - "American Idol." New. Sexy. Every one's favorite. It is unbelievable how far this program has gone in such a short time. Randy Jackson could pull off the "Mohawk" but I can't see Paula in one. However, we would like to see Simon Cowell challenge Coach Leavitt.
Pitt - "Deadliest Catch." Blue collar; salt of the earth program. They hope that their "catch" against WVU wasn't a fluke. Will interest and captivate viewers if they can pull in enough wins to compete for the Big East title.
Syracuse - "Who Want’s to be a Millionaire?" Has done well with good hosts - Jim Brown/Donovan McNabb/Regis. Without, they are stuck in syndication on the 4 o'clock hour making them relevant only to old alumni in Florida. "Ready for the early bird special Earl?" Cincy - “Dancing with the Stars.” Show exploded on the scene last year with big wins thanks to nifty moves and great QB play. Can they make it a tradition moving forward or will their game be canceled?
Louisville - "Real World." Always a juicy story whether it’s Petrino or new head coach Kragthorpe. Alumni continue to fight and bicker about what might have been! Makes you wish Puck would come back to your TV.
The 2008 college football preview magazines are starting to hit shelves at a store near you! Of coarse this college football guy had to be the first person in town to buy Lindy's College Football 2008 Preview. While thumbing through the glorious, full color, glossy pages and reading the predictions of the upcoming season it made me think, just how accurate are these magazines?
It occurred to me that there was just one way to find out. So I slipped on my red and white Nike's, threw on my jean jacket, cranked up Huey Lewis & The News, hopped into the stainless steel Dalorean, put the pedal to the metal until that speedometer reached 88 miles an hour and went back in time to May 2007. There I found a copy of Lindy's 2007 Preview and want to share these actual, 2007, predictions with you. (I couldn't make this up if I tried.)
Lindy's Rose Bowl Pick - Cal vs. Michigan
Ohio State at Michigan - If Wolverines don't win, it's gonna feel like Chad Henne, Mike Hart and Jake Long came back for 'nuthin.
We wish...that Navy, doing so well under coach Paul Johnson, could finally end a 43-game losing streak to Notre Dame that dates to the Roger Staubach era.
Why is the ACC ranked No. 2 (best conference)? What the league has is amazing depth that rivals or surpasses the SEC.
Kansas - Sophomore QB Todd Reesing will continue to compete for the starting spot, but likely will be a backup.
Oregon at Michigan - Trying to slow down RB Jonathan Stewart will prepare UM for Big Ten.
Oklahoma at Colorado - Couldn't CU officials have picked an easier homecoming foe?
Michigan brought in a solid class that included star playmaker Ryan Mallett at quarterback.
Ohio State at Washington - Huskies' schedule still reads like the school is a powerhouse.
And the favorite to win the 2007 Big 12 Conference championship is....Nebraska? That far-fetched prediction is brought to you by the Committee to Save the Big 12 North.
Notre Dame at UCLA - Bruins might want to shelve the prevent defense this time around.
Louisville - The defense should be fine, but if the Cardinals have to win in a shootout, so be it. Just like last season, Louisville should be in the hunt for the national title.
Stanford at USC - Only big in seeing how much Carroll runs it up on Harbaugh.
South Florida at Auburn - QB Matt Grothe and Bulls will be thinking upset.
Appalachian State - Dare we say "dynasty?" ASU reloads to take a shot at FCS' first three-peat.
BTW - If some dimwitted slime ball starts winning a lot in Vegas and turns Hill Valley into a gang infested slum it means Biff stole my 2008 preview while I was back in 2007.
As predicted in an earlier post the BCS commissioners got together this week and said NO to a college football playoff, but YES to two more exciting bowl games! Now 68 teams will be able to participate in bowl games this year!
Lets do some math here. There are 119 NCAA teams. 68 divided by 119...Carry the one...Add the two...57% of college football teams are going to bowl games next year! Remember when you played little league and at the end of the season EVERYONE got a participation trophy? Congrats NCAA you are getting really close to copying this format!
I was just thinking the other day about how unfair it was that Louisville (6-6), Iowa (6-6), Northwestern (6-6), Louisiana-Monroe(6-6), and Ohio (6-6) didn't make a bowl game last year. Guess what folks they will be in this year! Fantastic!
Also announced is that the NCAA had an attendance of 1.6 million people and made $222 million last bowl season. The NCAA's current TV contract a 6 year $320 million deal with FOX expires at the end of 2009. That pales in comparison to the 11 year $6 billion deal that it has with CBS for "March Madness." How interesting...
All in all, Navy really got the short end of the stick. If the Midshipmen become bowl eligible they now trade San Diego and the San Diego Credit Union/Visitors Bureau/Sea World Poinsettia Bowl for, winter in DC, playing in a BASEBALL stadium! HORRIBLE!
In this week's podcast we address why so many big games were so sloppy this week.
Just in time for Sunday's start of the Discovery Channel's Shark Week, The College Football Guys bring you the Top Sharks of College Football.
Rich Rodriguez - Initially appeared to be the good guy when he told Alabama no and said he would stay and coach his alma mater for years to come. This might have been true if Michigan had figured out a way to beat a I-AA team from Boone, NC. Rich Rod left for Michigan in the middle of bowl preparations and refused to pay agreed upon buyout.
As predicted in an earlier post the BCS commissioners got together this week and said NO to a college football playoff, but YES to two more exciting bowl games! Now 68 teams will be able to participate in bowl games this year!
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