It has been played to the hilt the past 48 hours. Tim Tebow will NOT accept a nomination, or a spot on the Playboy All-American Team claiming he cannot endorse a magazine that has naked women in it. This is the latest off season news story portraying the life of a perfect human being. Causing more and more people to really question "Is Tim Tebow indeed the Second Coming of Christ?"
We here at The College Football Guys have asked that very same question on a variety of different occasions and are ready to break it down for you. Lets find out once and for all how "The Chosen One" stacks up to the Almighty One.
Wears sandals - Check. "The Favored One's" ugly orange and blue Crocs would constitute as today's sandals. Honestly it is too bad he can't get paid to promote the struggling company. He is single handily making them solvent.
Heals the sink and the poor - Check. Tebow has been on 3 mission trips this summer and everyone knows by now that he performed circumcisions in the Philippines over spring break.
Gave "The Heisman" stiff arm to Satan three times in the desert - Check. While Tim didn't exactly spend time in the desert, he did defy Satan by choosing a missionary trip over scantly clad and loose college women on Spring Break. He told Hef he wasn't interested in his "evil" mag.
Little known fact - he resists the temptation of Wal-Mart's low prices, choosing not to support the "evil empire." He also hates Darth Vader and encourages children to use "the force" that only the Almighty can give.
Reaches out to societies worst - Check. Tebow spoke to two Florida prisons this off season and has been asked to speak to prisons in 5 other states!
Christ had 12 disciples - Check. This one is EASY! TT has more than 12 internet fan clubs! Each with their own "official president" and droves of devote followers. Included in the hysteria is a site he might want to talk to the owner about http://www.tebowner.com/. If Hef ain't good enough, I doubt that pun is.
Gave the Sermon on the Mount to thousands - Check. Tebow plays every Saturday in front of crowds that Christ himself would be jealous of.
Turned water into wine - Check. Everyone knows the power of #15's legs when a play breaks down.
Celibate - Jury's Out. While there are SEVERAL pictures on the web of "The Chosen One," with many beautiful women, according to this article he currently has no time for a girlfriend.
From the evidence above it appears that indeed the Second Coming of Christ walks and talks amongst us. This leaves us with one question, "Who is the AntiChrist Tim Tebow has come to save us from?" The one professed to bring the world into total darkness?
Maybe you can help us find him, before it is too late! Need help spotting he/she/it, here are the characteristics it is professed to possess. We are relying on you to put together your own creative juices and let us know who you think the "AntiChrist" is.
Contribute below or email us at firstname.lastname@example.org.