Burning Desire

It appears that Gold Bond's relationship with USC football is on the mend. After years of being the official "junk reliever" of the Cardinal and Gold, a relationship so tight that Gold Bond even marketed themselves with USC colors, Gold Bond and USC have kissed and made up.

The Trojans today admitted to acting like a big jerk and are in desperate need of Gold Bond's healing touch after an outbreak of "jock itch" hit camp. As many as 25% of USC players have been afflicted with the "epidemic."

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