Friday, September 19, 2008

Nice Vespa! Dork!

It seems with the cost of gas pushing the $4/gal mark this year, college students have become even more efficient on how to save money when commuting to class.

More and more students are resorting to bicycles and actually using the university provided bus. Still others, particularly those whose expenses are subsidized by the university, football players perhaps, are finding it hip to get around on mopeds. However even though the two wheeled beast is too cool for words, it appears that mopeds are indeed governed by the same rules as any other automobile.

Who knew?

Jonathan Casillas, senior linebacker for the Wisconsin Badgers is finding this truth out the hard way. One crisp and beautiful, August Wisconsin evening he was pulled over by campus police. Jonathan had been drinking that night and after blowing a 0.15 was sited for driving under the influence.

This got us at The College Football Guys to thinking that since these mopeds are such a new phenomena to college campuses that some education is in order.

The following is a public service announcement to all students out there, and those thinking of making the switch to a scooter as your primary means of transportation. With the aid of youtube and a few drunken idiots we bring you some signs to let you definitively know you are too drunk to safely operate such a fine piece of machinery.

The inability to drive in a straight line.

You feel a loss of control.

You pretend to be Kellen Winslow.

You think that your girl's undies make a sufficient substitute for wearing a helmet.

You keep telling the guy you just met at the party how it would be so cool to race mopeds on a professional circuit.

You convince that same guy that scooter skiing is a killer adrenaline rush, brah!

You think Naked Moped Joust is a new Olympic sport. (Why wouldn't it be? Makes sense to us.)

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